Yeah, me neither, until my social media guru Whitney let me in on it. Anyway, lucky for me, I’ve got three absolutely incredible kids to celebrate.  You might have a few of your own as well. The point of this day, according to its website, is to encourage people to tell their kids—or to tell any kid, really, just why they think that kid is “incredible.”  I hope you’ll consider doing this because it reminds me of a sad story about a coaching client of mine.

This client had several kids and had always enjoyed a great relationship with them until his oldest son hit the late middle school/ early high school stage. Overnight, inside jokes about their favorite Sci-Fi movies and cartoon characters were replaced with teenage eye-rolling and sarcastic remarks. Little annoyances and hurts turned into awkward silences and space. My client and his son spent less time together. There were fewer conversations, no inside jokes, no playfulness. My client didn’t realize the distance and tension that had grown between them until one day, after several months, he and his son were having a discussion about “family duties” and his son said, “I know you love me dad, but it never feels like you like me. It just feels like you love me because you have to.”

Needless to say, that was a pretty devastating comment for my client to hear.  But it was also one in which he determined to make a change. He realized he had stopped trying to connect with his kid. He had stopped looking for the positive things about his son and only focused on the characteristics that had annoyed him. As a result, he had a damaged relationship that needed to be repaired. What about you? Your kid(s) know you love them, but do they know you like them?  Do they know why? Do you spend time telling them what you find interesting about them or what characteristics they have that you admire? What is it about the way they operate in the world that you think makes them awesome? Tell them. Make sure they know. Speaking this kind of positivity and recognition to them is an invaluable gift. It lets them know you truly “see” them beyond what you are “required” to. It will help validate them as a person and it lets them know you think they’re important.

Here’s another great thing: it doesn’t just work on kids; it’ll work on everyone you have a relationship with. Do you admire your co-worker’s organization skills and their ability to stay cool-headed during their weekly group presentation? Give them feedback! Are you impressed by your boss’s dedication to connect with each of their direct reports in a meaningful way? Let them know. Do you appreciate your spouse’s patience with your kids and marvel at their ability to promote peaceful negotiations between warring siblings? Tell them. When you do, you’ll provide them with encouragement and validation. You’ll be letting them know their actions matter, that they matter.  And who doesn’t need to hear that? Absolutely incredibly, everyone does.