The Workplace Therapist » Managing Professional Relationships
How to get a new boss to listen to you
In addition to death and taxes, what is certain is that at some point in our careers, we will be handed a “new” boss. Getting him or her to hear us is not always easy. The Myth There’s a myth out there that we need to put an end to right now. Here it is: “If I just do my job, keep my head down and fly under the radar, my new boss will eventually see my … Read entire article »
Filed under: Managing Professional Relationships, My Boss Doesn't Listen to Me
“My coworker is scary”
“My coworker is scary.” I must confess, I’ve been planning this dysfunction for quite some time, and since this is October, the month of creepy ghouls and ghastly ghosts, I thought, “how appropriate.” But these aren’t just entertaining campfire tales. There is a personal story behind each and every scary coworker I’m going to expose. Throughout my workplace adventures, I’ve barely escaped the clutches of office zombies, emotional vampires, workplace werewolves and corporate conjurers. My … Read entire article »
Filed under: Dysfunction of the Month, Managing Professional Relationships, My Coworker is Scary
My coworker is a werewolf
Is your coworker a workplace werewolf? One minute he or she is a pleasant and friendly colleague and the next they are foaming at the mouth, lunging at you with vicious verbal attacks. As a participant in one of my workshops recently told me, “I can go from zero to b—- in a hurry.” Working with a workplace werewolf is no easy task. Aside from the wounds, it can lead to its own kind of … Read entire article »
Filed under: Managing Professional Relationships, My Coworker is Scary
My coworker is an emotional vampire
Larry was a mysterious colleague. “Charming and captivating” were words his coworkers used to describe first meeting Larry. Larry just seemed to emit a certain attractive quality. It would reel you in like a moth to a flame. But then something strange would happen. The more time spent with Larry, the more his coworkers would complain of feeling drained and exhausted. Larry became known for turning 30 minute “touch base” meetings into 2-3 hour marathons … Read entire article »
Filed under: Managing Professional Relationships, My Coworker is Scary
My coworkers are zombies
What’s more popular right now than zombies? Zombie T.V. shows, zombie books, just about anything zombie is trendy. In fact, just yesterday I saw a road race in which zombies would chase participants as they attempted to complete course. Craziness. And while we may find amusement watching zombies slowly stagger after the living in search of dinner, what is not cool is to work with zombies as coworkers. As one who survived a zombie infested … Read entire article »
Filed under: Managing Professional Relationships, My Coworker is Scary
My office feels like a haunted house
Admittedly, I’ve always loved Halloween. As a kid, I didn’t just “kinda like” Halloween, I LOVED Halloween (it probably bordered on unhealthy). I had countless costumes, masks, decorations and books on how to scare others. I was so nuts over the holiday that annually I designed, orchestrated, and hosted a neighborhood haunted house. Friends, family and neighbors would converge, decked out in their creepiest attire and would attempt to scare the life out of our … Read entire article »
Filed under: Managing Professional Relationships, My Coworker is Scary
Has your negativity gone too far?
What are the signs your negativity has tipped too far? There are several warning signs that I plan on sharing, but before I do, I had a negativity moment over the weekend that has stuck with me. On Saturday morning, I was in the drive thru line at McDonald’s, picking up breakfast for my family when it happened. The car in front of me pulled forward so, naturally, I inched my car ahead to take … Read entire article »
Filed under: I'm Negative, Managing Myself – Personal and Professional Growth, Managing Professional Relationships
My workplace is negative
I get it. The last several years have been tough. “Do more with less… there won’t be any raises this year… you are lucky to have a job… we may have to close our doors tomorrow…” Working day-in and day-out under these conditions can get to anyone. A therapist colleague told me a story that I think captures this sentiment perfectly. Several years ago he had a client who was in a highly toxic, negative and … Read entire article »
Filed under: I'm Negative, Leading People & Organizations, Managing Professional Relationships
Be thankful
The last few months we’ve tackled the dysfunction of “negativity.” As we conclude this series and start a new dysfunction (and year for that matter), I can’t think of a more appropriate time for the prescription. There is perhaps no better antidote to negativity than healthy and regular doses of “thankfulness.” Seems too simple, huh? Let me explain. “People’s brains have a ‘negativity bias’” In recent WSJ article on smarter ways to discipline children, a quote from … Read entire article »
Filed under: I'm Negative, Managing Myself – Personal and Professional Growth, Managing Professional Relationships
Setting the right relationship goals
Every year I pick out one relationship that I want to improve. Sometimes it’s a work relationship. Other times it’s a relationship with a family member. Regardless, I set a specific relationship goal for the year. Some years I look back at the end of the year and say to myself, “Sweet. Things with X have definitely gotten better. Well done ‘B’ (that’s what I call myself. Feel free to call me that… or anything … Read entire article »
Filed under: I Don't Have Any Goals, Managing Myself – Personal and Professional Growth, Managing Professional Relationships
“Senior management is dysfunctional”
Sometimes dysfunction at work isn’t obvious. Sometimes we just feel the dysfunction. We know in our gut that things are not right but we can’t exactly put our finger on it. It’s not our boss, at least not most of the time. Our coworkers definitely aren’t perfect, but that doesn’t make them dysfunctional. It’s not them. And our job is fine. In fact, if this other “thing” could be removed, we might actually really love what we … Read entire article »
Filed under: Dysfunction of the Month, Leading People & Organizations, Managing Professional Relationships, Senior Management is Dysfunctional
Senior management isn’t clear
Ah yes, fuzziness and lack of clarity – a subtle yet deadly dysfunction that is all too common with senior management. Whether it’s working for an organization without a clear strategy to working for a senior leader that expects you to be a mind-reader, a lack of clarity from senior management is a killer. It kills morale, productivity, alignment and focus. It breeds anxiety, silos, rumors, frustration and distrust. Before we dive into the most common … Read entire article »
Filed under: Leading People & Organizations, Managing Professional Relationships, Senior Management is Dysfunctional
Senior management doesn’t listen
Is senior management at your organization guilty of not listening? Playing deaf in the senior management ranks is not an uncommon dysfunction but the price that leadership pays today is higher than ever. Let me give you an example. Not too long ago, in the days of overflowing corporate coffers and first class seats on the fast-growth train, it wouldn’t be uncommon for me to hear the complaint that “senior management doesn’t really listen.” While … Read entire article »
Filed under: Leading People & Organizations, Managing Professional Relationships, Senior Management is Dysfunctional
Senior management breaks promises
I was having lunch with a friend of mine a few weeks ago. After picking at his salad for nearly an hour, he dropped his fork, looked at me and said, “They promised.” Nothing more. After some probing, I came to learn that senior management at his firm had recruited him with the promise of a hefty raise after year one. When it came time to honor their promise, senior management suddenly had amnesia. “I don’t remember … Read entire article »
Filed under: Leading People & Organizations, Managing Professional Relationships, Senior Management is Dysfunctional
Senior management doesn’t trust
Trust is a powerful word. It just feels good to say it. Go ahead… say it. Don’t be shy. Ignore the guy in the cubicle next to you playing temple run on his phone. Trust is part of a list of words that if blurted out at work, no one will blink an eye (Other “blurtable” workplace words include: strategic, leadership, customer, excellence, service, etc…). Unfortunately, like other really important corporate buzzwords “trust” is overused … Read entire article »
Filed under: Leading People & Organizations, Managing Professional Relationships, Senior Management is Dysfunctional

Therapist, professor, consultant and radio host, Brandon Smith brings an upbeat, witty approach to the challenges of workplace health and dysfunction.
Listen to Brandon answer a reader's question about getting stuck listening to a coworker's constant venting.
Catch Brandon’s advice column weekly at STRATEGY magazine.


